Episode 9: The Hyrule Fantasy Part II

The second episode of the Hyrule Fantasy arc, and the third episode to include NG Medals

After a perilous adventure of taking photographs of hot Gerudo girls, The 4 Links, out of breath, manages to return and give the photographs to Oshus, completing their first task with a reward of 100 Rupees. Oshus then gives the Links the second task which involves helping an old lady carrying her bags. It sounds simple, except the bags weigh 16 stone each (16 Stone=101.6 kg), and have to be transported from Northern Lake Hylia to Northern Kakiriko Village, as Error translated. Bagu explains that this task tests the Links' strength, stamina and teamwork. Purple believes that they are treated like Gorons. Ignoring Blue's question of why the old lady is carrying bags that heavy, Oshus, Bagu and Error will double their prize money if they suceed. They also revealed that the Links needed to have enough money to buy a special map that cost 1000 Rupees being sold by the Link's most hated NPC, Tingle. Red criticizes Tingle, and gets punished by Oshus for disrespecting the "map-making prodigy". Oshus scolds them for wasting time, and tells them to head to their quest. The Links sigh as they leave, with Blue mumbling "8-bit my ass."

At Lake Hylia, the Links meet Impaz, the old lady of the task. After showing the two gigantic bags, Impaz gave them two power bracelets. (could be worse if they're doing this with Iron Boots on). Impaz's horse refuses to carry her bags. Blue has a plan. Two Links pull, while the two Links with the bracelets push, and it will take them 10 hours to do so (5 hours if they're feeling the Goron power). Blue and Link push, while Red and Purple pull.

Hours later, Impaz explains that they're almost there, but Purple replied that she said that five minutes ago. They got a break, but Impaz notices their lack of stamina, but Blue says that its because of the useless Power Bracelets. Impaz explained that she used to have Power Gloves until a thief stole them all away.

Suddenly, they noticed the thief Impaz mentioned as he stole one of the bags. Red used his hookshot. impaz tried to stop him, but it was too late, the bag exploded after Red touched it with his hookshot. Blue told him that's exactly why he kept the bow and arrows in Episode 2, because they can't spell murder backwards without red. After Impaz explains what she has in the bags (Bomb Bags, Bomb Shoes, Blast Masks, Powder Kegs), Blue Link realizes that they were carrying explosives, and questions Impaz's inability to put a sign that says Hazardous Materials. Impaz replied that the Links wouldn't have accepted the task if she did. Purple did smell gunpowder, but he didn't tell because the Links wouldn't listen. Now the Links worry about what should they explain to Oshus. Red says that they would a say a Goron took it, or a wizrobe did it (See Episode 8's Ocarina Scene for reference). Impaz said not to worry, because the Links managed to get farther than the other's have gotten, and thanks them for stopping the thief. Blue says they take the bags to Impaz's house and explain it to Oshus.

Unfortunately, when the Links came back, Oshus took notice of the incident and scolds them for their behaviour because of the Gossip Stones. After Blue blurted out the cock jokes at the village, Oshus, Error and Bagu couldn't help, but laugh as they knew about it as well, and teases the Links for their time with Cojiro, the super cucco. Oshus gave them 50 Rupees for completing the task halfway. Red wants a merit for the thief he killed, But Error and Bagu replied that killing the thief wasn't part of the task.

Oshus needs to quench his thirst, so for task number 3, they need to ask Darunia and the Gorons for some Goronade. Little did they know, the Links have to battle Darunia in a sumo wrestling ring. Red knew about Darunia's cage match wins of 13-0. It's Green's turn. Blue tells Green to use Darunia's momentum against him. After Darunia says "What'cha gonna do, brother?" and boasts about his popularity. Green charges in, but was instantly knocked out. Purple remarks how super effective Darunia's tackle was. Before Green fainted, he mumbled that Dodongo dislikes smoke. Red and Purple argue about who would go next. Blue volunteers, as he has a plan. At the start of Blue's turn, he used the Ocarina, and played Goron's Lullaby, thus putting all the Gorons including Darunia, to sleep. Then, Blue knocks him out using a bomb. Green regained consciousness and was surprised that Blue won the match with a few outside interference, because Red was turning yellow, which Red refuses to admit. Purple obtained the Goronade, and the Links escape before the Gorons woke up

They gave the Goronade to Oshus, and gained 100 more rupees.

Unfortunately, the fourth task involved the Magic Mirror from the Eastern Palace. It was Red's whole fault because he took the mirror from Green and threw it out of the Eastern Palace, and was presumed gone (Episode 3)(Smoke obtained it and used it). Blue told Red that now that he destroyed the key item, would Red like to kill NPCs to continue to botch the campaign. Oshus was furious that the Links failed a task that they haven't even started yet. Green explains the events from Episode 1-3 about the mirror (magic mirror broken, teleportation to random places, Red got rid of the mirror because it was dangerous, he claims that Green was reckless with it).

Oshus decides that the mirror isn't needed after all, but punishes the Links by making them clear the Tower of Hera 20 times or the troublesome puzzles of the Water Temple. The Links are all staring angrily at Red because he got the Links and himself into this mess, and Red must choose their poison path, which will be chosen in the next episode.

References:

1) As mentioned last episode, Error and Bagu came from Zelda II

2) Oshus is named after a Phantom Hourglass NPC of the same same

3) Impaz, the old lady of the task referenced the non-playable-character of the same name in Twilight Princess

4) Darunia is the name of the Goron that appeaed in Ocarina of Time

5) After finding out what she's gonna do next episode, Zelda used Din's Fire on the producer. The Din's Fire attack comes from Super Smash Brothers.

6) If you are 18 and decided to look through the dirty magazine, you will be greeted to nude photos of the Forest, Fire, Water, and Shadow Sages from Ocarina of Time. The author censored the pictures.

NG Medals/Hidden Features:

1) Operation Moonfall - Click on the "When is the next one coming out?" option, and the Moon immediately crashes into your screen. The screen fades to black with the phrase, "You've met with a terrible fate, haven't you?".References Majora's Mask

2) Goron Mania Is Rolling Wild - When Darunia mentions bodyslamming Andre the Biggeron, Click on him to show said battle.

3) The Hidden Gerudo Oasis - Click on the photographs on Oshus's hands to see the portraits of the girls in their swimsuits. The first picture two girls relaxing, and two girls playing volleyball. The next picture shows the girls surprised, and startled by the Links unexpected picture taking, and the last one shows the girls attacking the Links with arrows.

4) Royal Pain - At the end of the credits, Click on Green Link's face when he's facing you. You have 10 seconds to do so. You will be greeted to a cameo appearance by Princess Zelda, herself, who now complained about not having any lines in the last episode, and in this episode, prior to her only two lines in Episode 7. Due to the producer adding suspense to the biggest story arc coming up. The producer have a great idea to discuss with Zelda. Zelda wants to have more screentime than Malon. Producer wants to explain it to Zelda and keep it a secret from Link. Zelda was shocked as she finds out what she's gonna be doing later and used "Din's Fire" on the producer.

5) Playrule Magazine Playmates - Before the Links go back to Oshus's cave, click on Purple before the scene changes to show him reading the dirty magazine obtained from Episode 8. People need to be 18 or older to view the magazine.